November 16, 2012

Becoming a Nontraditional Medical Student - Part Two

To continue from part one, I was chugging along in real estate and doing pretty well when I began to feel, well, strange. I'm a "do everything to your best ability" kind of girl, yet I didn't want to put in the effort to get and maintain clients, and quite frankly, I didn't feel like doing anything at all. All I knew was that there was something wrong and I didn't feel like myself. Looking back on it, I should have gone and talked to someone. You live and you learn I guess.

As strange as it sounds, it look me a long time to figure out it was real estate that was the issue. I really like helping people buy and sell houses - it's fun, but I realized that I didn't feel the least but fulfilled by my job. I didn't feel as if I was truly making a difference in people's lives. Once I had put my finger on the cause of my emotional turmoil, the soul searching began. I think most of us never really sit down and think "what do I want out of this life?". I believe that each minute we're given is a gift, and if you have the ability to find and do what you really love then you have been blessed more than most.

It was emotionally wrenching to work through what I thought my life would be like and attempt to find where I wanted my life to go. I'd always had this vision of exactly how things would go in my life, when I would hit certain milestones, etc. For me personally, I think letting go of that vision was the most difficult of all. Once I did though, it was as if this giant burden had been lifted from my shoulders, and I was actually excited (if somewhat scared) about diving in to a future of unknowns.

After exploring other options and talking to Lars and my mom until I was blue in the face, I realized that I would love to be a physician, maybe even get into academic medicine and teach future physicians as well. Lars and I talked about this new idea for a while and decided to jump in full force and only then did it really hit me - holy crap, I have to take the MCAT... (to be continued)

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